


Delicate Kryptonian Flowers

by Hollywood_Recycle_Bin



Category: Smallville
Genre: Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-04-17
Updated: 2009-04-17
Packaged: 2017-11-01 16:45:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,425
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/359068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hollywood_Recycle_Bin/pseuds/Hollywood_Recycle_Bin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set in season 7. Four scantily clad girls. One Clark Kent. Can you guess what happens?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Delicate Kryptonian Flowers

Beta read by Author07 (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1458676/)

Lana tried her best not to swear out loud as she pressed the button on the air condition one more time. It was the middle of April and once again, Smallville was hit with the biggest heat wave since the beginning of her sophomore year in high school. It was just her luck that the air condition decided that today would be the perfect day to break down.

“Damn it!” She swore softly to herself and put the remote control down. Who would have thought that the girl who brought Lex and Lionel Luthor to their knees could be so easily defeated by an air con?

Deciding once and for all that there was no way she could win; Lana opted instead for a nice cold glass of lemonade she spotted in the fridge that morning. She stopped when she noticed a pair of tanned legs lying on the kitchen floor.

“Kara?!” She said, alarmed as her eyes scanned the room for the nearest weapon, wondering who it was that broke in and took down the resident super girl.

“Yes Lana?” Kara answered in her usual cheerful tone, Lana breathed out a sigh of relief. It was obvious that nothing happened to the girl; she just thought she’d suddenly lie down on the floor...topless?

“Kara?” Lana repeated her name again, as she went further into the kitchen. The younger woman was lying down on her front, on top of a long pillow, obscuring her breasts from view, for which Lana was eternally grateful. She still, however, could find no reasonable explanation as to why the Kryptonian girl would be lying on the hard tiled floor in nothing but a pair of short shorts.

When no explanation came, Lana decided to ask, “Kara, why are you lying topless on the kitchen floor?”

The girl smiled at her, bright as sunshine. “It was hot outside,” she answered, as if that explained everything.

“I see,” Lana replied, though really she didn’t see at all. At the expression on Lana’s face though, Kara decided to give her a longer explanation.

“The air con broke and I wanted to do some reading, brush up on my English a bit. The floor here is nice and cool; perfect for a day like this.” At her explanation Lana noticed the book lying on the floor in front of her. Wuthering Heights; her favourite.

Kara smiled at her. “There’s plenty of room if you want to join me” she said, still as cheerful and innocent as ever, nothing in her voice indicated that she realised what she was doing was completely weird.

Lana wondered if this was normal Kryptonian behaviour.

The girl was still looking at her expectantly, when she saw Lana opened her mouth to say no, she cut in with a pleading tone in her voice. “Oh come on Lana. Come hang with me for a bit. I know it’s your day off at the foundation today and I really don’t have that many friends. It’d be nice if we could hang out more, you know, get to know each other a bit.”

Apparently Kryptonians are Lana Lang’s Kryptonite because against her better judgement, Lana plopped herself down on the floor next to Kara.

“You need to take your clothes off for it to work, silly” Kara prodded, and with a sigh Lana complied, questioning her own sanity as she peeled off her tank top and sweat pants. She refused to take off her underwear though but Kara didn’t seem to care about that. Lana was glad she’d already made sure all the doors were locked; part of a paranoid habit instilled in her from her brief stint as a Luthor; Clark said he was going to be away for most of the day.

He had a meteor freak to deal with, though he told Lana not to worry, that this one wasn’t that much of a threat and that he didn’t need anyone’s help on it.

The brunette laid herself slowly down on the floor, copying Kara’s position. She moaned softly when her sun scorched skin touched the coldness of the tile. She was surprised to find she didn’t mind the hardness of the floor that much once the wonderful coolness began to seep into her heated body.

“See, I told you they were perfect,” Kara said, and Lana surprisingly found that she agreed with her.

***

...10 minutes later...

“Clark?” Chloe called out once she closed the door. The key to the Kent’s home was hidden in a potted plant next to the front door. She always found it odd that despite all their secrets that they still kept it in such an obvious place.

When Clark didn’t answer, Chloe thought she’d drop off the files somewhere and leave when she heard giggling coming from the kitchen. Her curiosity was peaked and she walked over to investigate. Her mouth dropped open at what she saw.

“Hey Chloe!” Lana greeted, happy as a kid at Disneyland, which was strange enough as it is considering that this was Lana Lang, Queen of the Angst, herself. What was weirder though was the fact that her usually prim and proper best female friend was currently lying on the Kent’s kitchen floor in nothing but her underwear.

Lying right next to her was Clark’s cousin, wearing even less up top.

“Did I just walk myself into Clark’s secret fantasy?” She asked as she surveyed the room for signs of this being Clark’s subconscious or some sort of alternate reality. But no, everything was completely normal (well normal for Smallville anyway), everything except for the fact that Lana Lang and Kara Zor-El were lying half naked on the kitchen floor.

Lana laughed at the look on Chloe’s face. “No, Kara and I were just hanging out.”

“Naked?”

“Yes,” Kara answered, as if it was the most natural thing in the world. Chloe really didn’t know what to say to that.

“Kara was just explaining to me how in Krypton, nudity is seen as a natural part of life and that while they do wear clothes there most of the time because they enjoy fashion and also because sometimes it’s cold outside, the body wasn’t seen as something that needed to be covered up.” Lana explained to her best friend, who was still looking at her suspiciously.

“So now that you’ve learnt this wonderful tidbit about Kryptonian culture you wanted to expand your horizons by engaging in the Kryptonian activity of hanging out, naked?”

“Well it is pretty hot outside. And this floor is nice and cold. Why not?” Lana answered—it sounded almost like a dare.

“So, Chloe, do you want to join us?” Kara asked. “There’s plenty of room and Clark said he won’t be back till much later if you’re worried about him seeing you.”

Chloe looked at Lana again. Well, if Lana could do it... Why not right?

***

...15 minutes later...

Lois hated the heat. She really really did, especially when she had to wear a suit to work. Seriously, the Dailey Planet should make an exception for their dress code on days that are this hot. In fact the United States of America should make an exception to dress codes on days like this, they should make it the National Bikini Day and everyone will be allowed to wear a bathing suit to work.

An image popped into Lois’ head of the aging secretary that smelt like old cabbage with flabby arms in a bikini. Ok, maybe National Bikini Day isn’t that good of an idea, she thought to herself as she walked into the Kents home without knocking. She may not have been living there anymore but a part of her still felt like it was home.

Inside was only slightly less hot than outside and Lois started to undo the top buttons of her blouse, noticing that the air condition wasn’t working once again. As all the other girls did before her, she walked into the kitchen, hoping to find some ice to cool herself down with. She almost tripped over her cousin’s bare legs.

“Lois!” She was greeted happily. The three girls smiled at her from the floor.

“Hello.” Lois greeted in return as she took in the scene before her. Chloe and Kara lay next to each other on the tiled floor, a copy of Cosmopolitan open between them; their bare legs were touching slightly. Lana was sitting at the other end of the room, waiting for her toe nails to dry. None of them were wearing an appropriate amount of clothing.

“Are we having a penthouse style slumber party or something?”

“Or something,” Chloe replied with a mischievous grin. Then they all erupted into girlish giggles.

“Join us?” Lana asked, looking more relaxed than Lois had ever seen her. Lois looked at the other girls again, then to the door. She was certain Clark wasn’t around; none of them would be doing this otherwise.

“Alright,” she answered simply. It really was hot outside.

***

...20 minutes later…

Clark sighed contently as he stood in the sun. He knew that to everyone else in town this weather would be considered almost hellish, and for once he thanked his Kryptonian heritage for not only allowing him to tolerate this weather, but also for allowing him to enjoy the heat of the sun, washing over him in warm waves.

Clark wondered sometimes if the fact that he gained energy from the sun meant that he could be categorized as part plant by Earth’s standards. It was a silly thought, but still... not entirely impossible to Clark’s mind.

He never told anyone this but some days, spending too much time in the sun caused Clark to be slightly hyperactive and giddy. His parents used to have to tell him to stay inside some days when it was too sunny.

After all, raising a super powered Kryptonian kid was hard enough as it is without having to deal with the said kid being on what is essentially the alien version of a sugar high as well. Still, catching that meteor freak (Oops! I mean, MIP (meteor infected person). Gotta remember to be politically correct now that Lana’s is running a charity for them) had taken the edge off a bit, so while he was still slightly buzzed, he no longer felt the urge to run to Mexico and back. Instead he took off his shirt, basking in the glow of the awesome yellow sun for a few more minutes in the field before going inside.

The sound of girls giggling was heard as he walked through the door. Somehow it made Clark pause.

It wasn’t that Clark had anything against girls giggling. In fact, he usually really liked hearing girls giggle, especially if said girl was Lana (she didn’t giggle very often but every time she did, Clark’s heart skipped a beat. It was the most beautiful sound in the world in Clark’s opinion), but there was something ominous about it this time. Not, evil villian ominous, just... a little unnerving.

The sound was coming from the kitchen. As quietly as possible, Clark tiptoed towards it, determined not to be caught off guard by whatever it is Kara had planned for him. Somehow he knew that whatever it is the girls were doing, Kara was somehow behind it. Ever since he let her watch Punk’d on MTV; she’s been pulling all sorts of weird pranks on him, claiming that she was ‘getting acquainted with Earth’s customs.’

And to think, Kara was actually the one that was supposed to be raising him.

Clark shuddered at the thought as he came upon the kitchen. What he saw there made all of his coherent thoughts fly away.

“Lana! Umm, what, I mean how, wh-...”

Since coherent thought had already flown out the window, it wasn’t much of a surprise that coherent speech followed.

Lana smiled at her blushing boyfriend, mischief in her eyes as she flipped over on the floor so that she lay on her back, revealing the milky skin of her body and the small slopes of her breasts covered by the soft white bra. Despite the heat she undid the buns of her hair and let it cascade down her body, doing a little hair flip as she stared at him seductively.

“Welcome home Clark,” she said in a husky voice. Clark gulped.

“Hey Clark!” Kara said cheerfully from the floor next to her. “I see you’ve already gotten started,” she gestured to his shirtless state. “Why don’t you take off your pants and join us?”

“Yeah Smallville. Why don’t you join us?” Lois dared. Like Lana, she was giving him a tantalizing view of, significantly larger breasts.

“Yeah Clark! Come on!” Chloe goaded. Unlike Lana and Lois, she remained on her front, but still, she couldn’t resist wiggling her butt a little giving him her best sultry look.

“Gah! Err... I… uh... There’s a... I mean... the clothes, I couldn’t, and uh...” The girl’s eyes were fixed on him now, like a pack of wolves who’d found themselves a stray little lamb. Despite his tolerance for hot weather, there was still a thin layer of sweat on him, making his muscles gleam in the bright light.

Lois licked her lips suggestively and Clark gave an embarrassingly high pitched squeak. He was sure his blush had spread from his face all the way across his body now and he couldn’t help but fold his arms.

A vain attempt at hiding his body from their hungry eyes.

“Gotta go!” he announced as he ran out of the room.

***

Clark didn’t stop till he reached his bedroom on the second floor. He locked the door for good measure as he sat himself down on the bed, trying to get his heart to stop racing.

From downstairs he could hear the sounds of uncontrollable, almost hysterical laughter as the girls rolled around on the floor, almost crashing into each other as they kicked their feet and hit the floor in mad merriment.

The speech was broken with laughter as he heard them try to speak. Lois voice ringing loud and clear to his sensitive ears.

“Oh god! Clark is such a delicate flower!!”

More laughter.

“I know!” Chloe joined in. “Next time, we should get totally naked. He’ll probably explode!”

Clark sighed as he heard. Though he didn’t hear his cousin’s input, somehow, some way, he knew that this was all her fault.

The End


End file.
